Author's note: This is intended to be the preface to a book I'm writing about sexual and physical abuse. It will be a memoir - every word is true. The story actually gets worse after the preface. The preface will be in the third person, although most of the book will be in the first person. Feel free to tear it apart. Thanks for your feedback.




“Come here, please” he summonses her into his bedroom. Her heart constricts, knowing what will come next. It has happened before.

Entering the room, she sees him lying on his bed. He unzips his pants and pulls his penis through the fly. He doesn’t even bother to open his belt, possibly fearing that his wife will walk in the room. With his index finger he points to his penis, a silent instruction. At times like this he says very little. He doesn't have to.

She strokes his flaccid penis, and it becomes erect. It seems so huge to her. At least as big as her hand, maybe bigger. Up and down, she continues to stroke. He pulls her closer, holding her by her hair. A wave of revulsion overcomes her. Her chest heaves with self-loathing. It is almost impossible to keep from throwing up, but, imprisoned by his hands, she continues anyhow.

He starts to moan, ever so silently – a sure indication that worse is soon to come. The moans and groans get quicker, closer together. More intense. The penis throbs in her hand. Faster, faster she strokes, as much to get this over with as to please him.

She braces herself for the familiar sticky mess and the pungent smell that she knows she will soon experience. He explodes in a river of wetness. It spurts in her face, her eyes, in her hair, over her clothes. It comes in a seemingly never-ending gush. There was so much of it - an unwelcome invasion.

Satisfied, he does up his zipper and lies on his back.

‘You can go and play now”.

“Bye, Daddy”, she replies. The joyous skip in her step belies her internal agony. She puts a playful smile on her face in case she bumps into her mother.

Leaving the room, she relieves her revulsion the only way available to her. She goes to the bathroom and throws up.